• Tuesday Weigh-in: 191.4 •
I just ordered a pizza.
Wait, maybe I should back up a minute. It’s been a crappy week, both figuratively and literally. BamBam has had a nasty diaper rash for a couple of weeks now and, without going into too much detail, it…escalated on Tuesday. Add to that the fact that he decided last week, this 18-month-old, that he needed to crawl, nay fall, out of his crib, forcing his parents to remove said crib from his room to prevent injury and place his mattress on the floor, where he refuses to sleep, and you’ve got one cranky toddler. Mr. Crankypants gets pretty clingy when he’s cranky and, as he climbs into Mommy’s lap, his normally independent brother suddenly decides it needs to be his turn to sit there. It’s been a *fun* week.
Mommy’s tired. Tired of cranky kids. Tired of running around chauffeuring to various appointments. Tired of getting up at 5am to go work out. Tired of working out. Tired of thinking about every single bit of food I put in my mouth. I guess I didn’t really learn my lesson from the cupcakes, because I ate a bunch of sugar-laden stuff yesterday. Then I went looking for something salty. What I really wanted was a piece of extra-sharp cheddar, but all I could find was light cheese, so I ate some pepperoni and some dill pickles. Desperation, huh?
You know, they say that using food to comfort doesn’t really work. I take issue with that, because it does work. If it didn’t, I’d have no problem avoiding it. Sure, the comfort doesn’t last long, maybe five minutes. The thing is, when you’re home with small kids and they’re sick and everything seems to be exploding around you, that five minutes may be all the comfort you get.
Mommy needs a break. I can’t get one from the kids, so I’ve decided to take one from the Program. Just for today. I’m hoping to hit the ground running tomorrow. Refreshed and ready to go.
So, I ordered a pizza. And I’m going to eat it.
Another stalking Betty here. I am working my way through as many of “our” blogs as I can. Betties are wonderfully well spoken! (But we knew that.) Congratulations on all that you have accomplished. I have struggled with my weight since I was about 11 (I’m nearly ten years older than you are), blaming much of my problem on “baby pounds” -sadly the last baby I had just turned 21. Sigh. Keep up the good work, and keep looking at that amazing chart, it is inspirational to us all.
Julie
Lunar Betty
I think part of creating change is figuring out how to fit the pizza days into the grand scheme of things. Let’s face it, you love pizza and you have two small children. These are two things that suggest to me that you will be eating pizza in your future.
I couldn’t agree more about the comfort of food. It’s one of the ways I try to be kind to myself sometimes. Not everyday, of course. I wonder if we all just need to put food in the tool box along with many other things. So maybe later this week you decide to be kind to yourself by giving your body a great workout, or staying up a little too late to watch your favorite movie, or buying a new shirt. I hope you enjoyed the pizza and I hope the diaper rash is clearing up. Hang in there. You are doing great!
Sorry you’re having such a rough week. I totally get the comfort food thing. Personally, I can’t have pizza in the house unless I have friends over. It’s a binge food for me.
However, you’ve made a conscious choice to order, eat and enjoy pizza. That looks like a positive way to handle this particular food. You’ve had a big dose of “doing for other people” and dealt with a lot of things that you couldn’t really control. So, making a choice that pleases you and acting on it gets a thumbs up from me.
Sometimes we need a break.
Go Mama! Try that comfort food even if it only lasts a few minutes and then remember that tomorrow is another day and the boys are going to get better eventually.. I hope things are much better for all of you tomorrow. I continue to be very proud of you and to enjoy your great stories. You rock!!
You aren’t superwoman, and that’s okay. Please don’t punish yourself for being human. Enjoy your moments. This is just right now, things will change. I promise.
Meanwhile, do your best. Take joy whenever and wherever you can. And, of course, continue to be fabulous.
Hey everybody – Thanks for stopping by and for the words of encouragement. I’m doing much, much better today. I think I really just needed the break yesterday. BamBam had a better day, too, poor little guy.
@June – I love your idea of putting food in the toolbox. Relegates it to just another tool and takes away some of it’s power. It also takes away the stigma of it being good or bad because it’s just a tool. Yep, I like that very much.
And I think pizza will always have a place in my diet, just not a very prominent one. Once I get to maintenance I can do a 90/10 thing where I’m careful about what I eat 90% of the time and eat whatever I want for the remaining 10%. I think I’ll do well with that, but I have to get to maintenance first. If I start doing it too often now I’ll slow my weight loss down too much!
@Mary Stella – the pizza was delicious. And you’re right about things I couldn’t control. I hadn’t looked at it that way, but it helps me put it in perspective. I wasn’t feeling guilty about the pizza because I knew it was the right thing for me to do, but your insight helps me know why it was the right thing. Thanks for that.
@BettyX – Thanks for saying that. I’m not punishing myself, I’m really not. Once I decided to eat the pizza I just gave in to it. It’s been a rough week, but really seemed to get better after the pizza. Funny what cutting yourself a little slack will do for you, huh? I’ll have to try to remember that in future.
I saw that pizza delivery guy in our driveway and had the thought that a real freind would run over there and scream “don’t do it!” but then thought…no, Do it! We have to take those moments when we do things like that, especially as mothers…those moments when we get to do what we want to do instead of what we have to do for the little people in our lives. If making the decision to order a pizza and eat it is your moment then I say just do and make sure you do with out any guilt!
Sounds like we have the same loves…pizza and cheese of all kinds are my go to foods!
LOL Dorene! Next time you see the pizza guy over here, just come on over and have some with me. I guarantee it will be pepperoni. I’ll even share the crunchy chocolate cake things I get with it. 🙂
Pizza and cheese rock!